"Dating Advice for the Chronically Single"

How to Talk to Random Girls Anywhere?

2009-07-01T19:36:00.000-07:00

The most important part of dating and seduction
has to do with being able to meet the kind of
women you want. The problem is, most guys can't
do that! They may get tongue-tied, don't know
what to say, or just simply freeze up -- paralized
with fear!

The good news is that now there is a book that
can help you with all your problems with meeting
and dating women so you never have to let another
opportunity pass you by again. This book is
called "The Art Of Approaching." If you can learn
what this book has to teach you, meeting beautiful
women will quickly become second nature to you.

The big advantage you receive with "The Art Of
Approaching" course is an exact, step-by-step
method is laid down for you to follow that will
have you meeting tons of women in no time. It
covers all the bases, from meeting a woman, to
attracting her, how to pick up on the subtle cues
she sends out to let you know she likes you, and
to creating confidence within yourself so you
don't have to worry about rejection or uncertainty.

Author Joseph Matthews says "I used to be
completely hopeless with women. I was
too afraid of rejection to ever talk to a woman
I found attractive. But through much trial and
error, I discovered a way to overcome my fear and
meet the kind of women I enjoy. I wrote this book
to share my methods and hard work so that other
guys don't have to go through what I did to get
good with women. I wanted it to be the ultimate
starter-guide for men looking to improve their love
life, and judging by the amazing emails I'm getting
from readers who can now meet and attract any woman
they choose, I think I succeeded."

Deep inside "The Art Of Approaching," Joseph
spills the beans about what it takes to empower
yourself as a man and attract women to you. The
book is broken down into different sections.
Some of them are:

* The Art Of Body Languge
* The Art Of Confidence
* The Art Of Approaching
* The Art Of Flirting
* The Art Of Storytelling
* The Art Of Being Social

Every facet of meeting and attracting women is
explored in depth in these sections. The best
section, by far, is on confidence -- a subject that
little to no other authors would ever go as in depth
into. After reading this section, however, I'm
convinced Joseph has discovered a way to truly
instill a powerful set of believes and get rid of
any fear of rejection or failure you could ever
have when it comes to women.

"The Art Of Approaching" ebook is perhaps the most
useable and practical book of it's kind on the net.
It will produce fast results for you and this is
what counts the most. And if you find the book is
not for you, Joseph offers a money-back
guarantee, so you can check out the book risk free.

If you'd like to learn more about "The Art Of
Approaching," click the link below:

http://www.artofapproaching.com

Podcast: Perfect Text Game

2009-03-18T16:23:00.000-07:00

Turn numbers into dates and girlfriends. If you've got one hour, you'll get ALL the secrets you need!

# Why calling her is the kiss of death and what to do instead every time
# How to use nothing more than text to turn her on
# Manage multiple women EASILY and without work or drama with text
# Exactly what to say in text to get her hot and bothered
# Critical mistakes you cannot make if you want to get a date

Get in on the secrets now and start turning those numbers into real hot dates right away, with no work, no rejection, no fear, just results.

Listen to the Perfect Text Game with Sean Messenger now:

Here's what students who were on the teleclass have told me about their instant results from this class:

"Since listening to your podcast about text game, which admittedly was a very different approach from the one we had been using, my wingmen and myself have been getting laid like rockstars. From that single podcast, we've gone from getting laid twice a month, to getting laid 12 times per month. I'm finally confident that, with a little patience, I can use text game to turn any number close into a date." - Matt, USA

"Thanks so much for your tips at the teleclass. Your stuff is already starting to work!" - Lee

"Thanks for the notes. The call was great, I used some of the texting stuff this weekend and it worked wonders." - Josh

"Just listened to the call on text messaging. Excellent stuff, Sean - really very useful." - Joseph N.

Click Here for More

How to Have Women Approach You

2009-03-18T16:21:00.000-07:00

From the http://sexualpresence20.wordpress.com/

Every man dreams of having girls check him out. Every man dreams of being the guy who walks into any room and has the gorgeous eyes of every hottie look at him with lust.

Every man dreams of being the MAN that women try to pick up.

Well, it ain’t just a dream. It’s real. I’ve found the key, and now I’m going to unlock it for you. My friend Lucy, an expert in Loving Tantra, taught this to men who, well, the kind of men who hear the word “Tantra” and immediately tune out, thinking there’s some wacky hippy-dippy sensitive-pony-tailed guy stuff at work. But as soon as they finished this exercise, they went from average guys to MEN who were drawing women’s eyes everywhere they went.

What women look for in a man is very simple. They need to see your Power, and Your Vulerability. They need to see your Strength, and your Love. They want to feel, to be blunt, your Hard **** in them, and your Open Heart on them. And there’s an easy way for you to start doing it right now.

This exercise is very powerful, and has a magnetic effect on women, so please don’t share this with anyone that you suspect is still angry, or bitter, or somehow unable to really Love women. I’m giving this to you because I trust you. Please respect that.

Now. Here is your exercise. Here is your practice. Here is the work that will transform you right now.

Stand up. Close your eyes. Quiet your mind, and focus on your breath. Now, start to feel your body. Don’t move, but simple pay attention to every part of your body, one at a time, as if a giant MRI machine was scanning you. Feel it all.

Now move that attention to your crotchatal region. You know the area I’m talking about. Bring your focus… all the way down where your focus usually is when you see a picture of a gorgeous girl. Just feel your body there, and keep breathing. Breathe deep, and breathe slow.

Now inhale. Inhale deep and slow, and as you draw your breath in, let your attention rise up from down low all the way up to the center of your chest. There’s a spot just above the zygomatic process, a space right above the center of your chest, where the energy of your heart lives.

Put your attention there, and exhale. Now move your attention back down, and breathe in again, and move your attention back up to your heart.

Imagine you are pulling the very real electricity that keeps your body alive from the very bottom of your spine, up that electrical highway to the center of your chest. Feel how the center of your chest begins to warm. Feel how the muscles between your ribs start to stretch, and even ache. Feel how that spot on your chest start to feel like a space, an opening, a portal from your Heart out into the world.

Keep doing this for just 5 minutes.

Now, open your eyes. You will find that all the annoying thoughts that have been plauging you like busy bees are suddenly just whispers. You will feel IN your body, and out of your head. You will feel that your Hard **** is strong, and your Open Heart is free.

THIS is how you walk through the world. Just go find a place where the kind of girls you like will be. Make yourself comfortable. Stand still, lean against a wall, or just grab a seat. Now with your eyes open or closed, do this exercise again. Every time you see a beautiful girl walk by, breathe in her beauty and let that energy fill you from **** to Heart. Let the feeling of pleasure fill you up. Let it grow and be.

When you do this, you will find that women’s eyes start to turn to you. They may stare, they may just look for a second. But they cannot help but look because the electricity you are moving and building is quite literally, scientifically, a magnetic force.

Women will be DRAWN TO YOU.

Women will be, in the parlance of the pickup “gurus,” ATTRACTED.

Literally. Attracted. Like iron filings to a magnet.

I know you are probably thinking what I thought when I first heard this. It’s crazy, and silly, and goofy, and does nothing. I mean, you have to be good-looking and rich and flashy for girls to look, right?

Here’s the real-deal. When I arrived in Toronto, I spent days walking around this city, admiring the variety of sexxxy women here. I was dressed well, I was smiling, I was looking good and feeling confident.

But not a single girl looked my way.

After I did this exercise last night, I went to a club where I really didn’t even talk to anyone, and not only had every girl there looking at me, but had a girl come up to me out of nowhere, drag me to the bar, by me a drink, and make damn sure that she got to spend as much time with me as she could while I’m here.

Today I sat at lunch and watched people walk by, and I counted 73 girls, all ages, all races, all sexxxy in their way, looking at ME.

I looked just the same as I did on Friday. Well, actually, I looked a little worse, cos I’m wearing a ratty shirt and have been sleep-deprived and hungover for days.

But it’s not what I looked like that drew them. It’s the FEELING I have. It’s the power in my body radiating out of my heart.

It’s the magnet of my masculine presence.

Do this now, and track your results. Then be sure to let me know what you find.

I already know what’s gonna happen, but I can’t wait for you to find out. smilie

Be Love and Be Free,

Sean

P.S. Here are the results from the exercise:

————————————————————–

I’m a bit flabber gasted right now to be honest. Now I usually don’t get into this hocus pocus bull shit but I said FUCK IT and tried it right before I went to work. At work I actually ended up having a girl ask me if we could hang out.

What the fuck…

————————————————————

“Did the exercise above for a good 2 minutes. Doubting it would work. Two days later I’ve had a party, but totally forgot to do the exercise again. Result: Two hot girls totally eye fucking me the entire night even though one of them had a boyfriend for quite a long time. Had IOI’s quite the entire night by all the girls. This shit works like a charm! Will do proper exercises to see if it wasn’t just coincidence Smile

Not only this makes you feel better, you’re whole mind is much more at peace. Thanks!”

—————————————————————

Sean I just have to say a big thank you for posting this.

For me this has really worked. It’s incredible! I’ve noticed that girls will literally catch my eye and lock-on, leaving ME to break the eye contact.

I don’t take this so much as an approach signal as a recognition that this exercise changes something within me that is clearly visible in my eyes or in my energy. I’ve also found that after that first long look, girls will be comfortable about looking me right in the eyes again and again. It’s as if the vibe i’m giving off somehow compels them to do so.

Now i’m just an RAFC myself, so for me this is pretty major.

I’ve personally think that the vibes people give off are detectable by others. After all, radio waves are just energy, and even the weakest signals can be picked up, filtered and isolated by the smallest devices these days. So why shouldn’t other people be able to pick up our own human electrical vibrations/signals, even over large distances? I’ve just never found a way to effectively give out the right energy that attracts women, other than external visual signals such as peacocking, or social proof, etc. All I need to do now is get over my AA issues and I’m away!

So thanks again Sean. Please keep posting gems like this.

——————————-

from http://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/get-girls-to-check-you-out-vt34409.html?highlight=

wierd as hell when i first read it. no lie. i really though messenger was joking around. but i’m pretty sure i get it now. i tried it in private and i feel the difference (although it’s hard to maintain in public). its like walking into a room where a fight broke out but is now silent: you can feel the energy.
this makes me very curious though… i never believed in the whole chakra thing until now.

—————————–

I did it in starbucks few minutes ago..

there was a girl sitting studying, she didn’t even see me.. hottie

then i left starbucks to buy condoms, and on my way back..that girl was just sitting outside a restaurant and about to unwrap her sandwich.. she saw me from a distance..im like a block behind her..she turned back to face her table..then as im walking towards her she turned, i count 3 or 4 times, to look my way.. I wanted to approach her, had headphones on…didn’t know what to say…ok im walking by her, headphones off…goin inside my head as im getting closer (you can’t talk to a girl while she’s chewing a sandwich, no just open her tell her she’s cute and get the number and leave..no just say hi)

“hey how are you?”

she smiled: “im good, how are you?”

“im great”… kept walking

*waved to an imaginary person inside the sandwich place* lol, i know all the workers there and i say hi to them but there was no one inside working (they were in the back room) but i still waved to Dhv, i know lame smilie

but anyways..i think this shit works.. ill try to master it more..

————————
True story:

Tried this the other day before going out in the afternoon to visit a friend.While I was riding my bike, I saw this super hot girl riding in front of me. Decided to do a quick version of it, just to get the feeling back, and the girl literally kept eyeing as I passed her, started readjusting her hair and everything. It was reallly fucking weird.

Then I started to do it the whole time to get girls reaction, but I messed up because i wasnt really relaxing, (in the back of my head I was going “Girls are soooo gonna check me out now”) and nothing happened. it wasnt untill I just decided to use it as a relaxation method, that I noticed girls looking at me again like crazy. Milfs, college girls, it also really made me feel like a real Alpha male. As If my inner Alpha came out.

===

Tried to today before I went to college. When I did it, I had a completely unreal experience. I think I did it TOO well if that makes sense. I started feeling like I was completely free and like I didn’t have any mass. I actually had to jerk my body a little to make sure I was still able to move my limbs. Again, I had women looking at me left and right. No crazy stories about women wanting to grab my ass, but women are MUUUUCH more open to be talked to when I’m this state. Hell, even dudes open me. This one girl sat beside me today and asked me something about the class. crossing her legs towards me rubbing her legs. She seemed horny as hell. When I finally talked to her a little bit, she completely bombarded me with questions.

===

I have this girl in math who’s been checking me out lately. Well today I did this exercise in the bathroom before going into class. As son as I see her she opens me and continues to open me all class with questions and banter. Just another example of how awesome this technique works.

===

Got curious about this and tried it this morning at college (strange story following).

I wasn’t really trying, I was just thinking: “Let’s relax a bit” and tried this exercise.
I’m quite practiced to meditation and respiration tachniques, so it had quick effecct on me. I instantly relaxed and got out of my mind. Felt really great. I was surrounded by noise and guys playing cards but I wasn’t affected at all.

Felt like the “little warm centre of the world”, as said in Fight club.

Then, after about 10 cycles, something really strange happened.

I opened my eyes for a few seconds, and glanced out of the window of the room. There was a group of girls passing by on the street, about 50 metres away from where I was.
I could barely see their faces, but two or three of them turned their head in my direction and were looking where I was standing, like if they smelled something tasty and wanted to know where the perfume came from. They were like hypnotized, and I thought, quite surprised: “what the hell are they looking at?”

I just couldn’t believe they were looking at me from this distance. I even turned around to see if there was something interesting going on that could attract their attention (like someone making strange gestures, or someone super peacocked or something like that).

Guess what? There was nothing but ME!:-O

The girls even slowed down to keep looking at me for a few seconds. They were REALLY interested. I was not breathing at all from surprise. That moment felt like forever. Then, after a few seconds, they slowly turned back to their group and continued along the road.

I was floored (and I’m right now, actually). I am not particularly beautifulm I was wearing normal clothes, I wasn’t doing anythin fancy, but those girls were looking at me from the other side of the street! And I wasn’t even trying at all! What the heck?

Is this technique so powerful? I just cannot rationalize this. This must be a coincidence, AN EXTREMELY LUCKY COINCIDENCE. But it just feels too much strage to me.

I’m going to test it for the next week and see if this shit truly works. In that case, Sean, you are my new personal hero :w00t:

===

If you haven’t dome the exercise yet…….waiting you for?

http://sexualpresence20.wordpress.com/2009/03/17/exercise-how-to-have-women-pick-you-up/

The Myth of Approach Anxiety (Picking up Women)

2009-03-11T06:21:00.000-07:00

Instant Confidence

2009-03-09T17:29:00.001-07:00

How to Keep a Girl from Cheating

2009-03-09T12:25:00.000-07:00

You can find a guy to teach you how to meet women. It ain't hard.

You can find a guy to teach you how to get her home from the club. It ain't rocket science.

But once you get her... then what? Say you find a great girl... how you gonna make this work?

I spent years f***ing up with my girlfriends in new and novel ways, and it took a lot of years of learning to figure out even the basics of making it work.

Now I know the secret, the most important secret, the secret that no one would ever tell me before: keeping her faithful.

Want your woman to stay with you and never betray you? Of course you do, you're a man. Here's how.

She NEEDS you to set the rules. No bullsh**, no backing down. You have to be willing to take the loss if necessary, but she needs to know you will always decide what is best for both of you. I've tried just being careful and considerate about it, and trying to understand her feelings, and it always ended in fights and tears. Now here's what I've discovered works.

Your woman brings up being with another guy, simply say:

"You are my girlfriend, and you are very special to me. But if you are with another man, I will end it immediately. There will be no argument, no tears. You want someone else, be with someone else. Because you will not be with me."

Say it as a statement of fact. No anger, no frustration. Set the rules like you would with a favorite child... she wants the certainty of your emotions. That's why she's testing you, dude! She knows you aren't sure enough of yourself to tell her what to do, and that's what she needs. She needs to know you are stronger than her. Why? Because then she can be free and emotional and expressive and not worry about you running away.

I once had a girlfriend say something really interesting. She said that after we spend a few days together and she goes back to work and into the world, she feels like she has to learn to walk again, like it's all new and annoying. She says that with me I make all the decisions and take care of her and make her happy, and she feels so safe and protected, and then when she has to do those things for herself, she gets frustrated.

You Make the Decisions in the Relationship - ALL OF THEM

Your woman can make her own decisions about the relationship. But she needs to know what you decide first. Never be shy about telling her what she MUST do to make the relationship work with you. It's operant conditioning. Forbid certain behavior and remove temptation, then reward the hell out of good behavior and encourage it more.

If this is all new to you, I can't recommend highly enough you join the UCP. Get in today by signing up and you immediately get access to over 40 podclasses and videoclasses, including my very best stuff on how to make a real adult relationship work.

I'm talking the kind of relationship MEN want. Not boys.

Remember, you have to make the decisions. You have to make the call. It's all on you, so decide what is right for you, no excuses. If you want something, go get it.

Make that decision on the UCP today and go for what you want:

http://lvo3.com/home/ucp

You gotta be Michael Corleone. You make the calls for you and her.

Wanna keep your girl happy? Never forget, you are protecting her because you love her. That's your job. Do it, and she will be happy. Don't do it, and she will leave.

In all our classes we will continue to focus on how you keep your woman happy, because a happy woman makes your world a wonderful place.

Wishing you peace, love, and great frickin' women,

Read more at -
http://lvo3.com

The Secret of Holiday Parties and Singles Events

2008-12-23T12:52:00.000-08:00

"The Secret of Holiday Parties and Singles Events"

This question came up on my lvo3.com forum, and as I clearly remember what it was like to get all nervous before holiday events, I wanted to share my advice here as well.

This question came up on my lvo3.com forum, and as I clearly remember what it was like to get all nervous before holiday events, I wanted to share my advice here as well:

Quote:

Hey Sean,

I'm seeing great results with the UCP (I actually am catching girls checking me out! Never would have believed it, but I'm changing so much.)

This is a question not related to the actual workshop/progress/results.

I have a singles event tomorrow night and just looking for some tips on what to do beforehand to give me the greatest chance.

I usually have a great time and approach quite a lot, although I usually only get one number and so far they haven't led anywhere.

It's a naughty or nice dressup party - professional thing. I like them because they have ice breakers. Okay so I'm thinking naughty or nice is a good theme for a little banter. If she dresses naughty I can call her on it 'so are you usually the naughty girl or does she only come out once a year' or 'i take it you're the nice girl' then if she says no I'm naughty I can say 'nah I've seen naughty and that's not it'.

Okay so I usually approach the girl say 'hey how are you, I'm jason' they introduce themselves I ask if they've been to this sort of thing before, what they do for work, what they do for fun, what they're passionate about, the venue, etc. The fun question is because hopefully they list something I enjoy too, and the passionate one is an easy way of finding out what they really like. If the girl is bubbly then I'm set because I am good at creating/extending conversations out of hooks and bubbly girls throw a lot of conversational hooks.

Just have to make sure I'm in the right frame of mind, at one I got a hug from some random girl and a few other things. And another chatted to a girl at the bar, she said she was there as support (had a ring) but then said we should dance later lol. And one 36yo (hooottt but 11 years my senior) said something about me being really...charismatic or something along those lines. That was a massive compliment to me and another one asked if I had an older brother hehe.

As you can see I ask standard questions as I run out of things to talk about if I try and ask random questions.

One problem I do have is getting the conversation to topics that relate to some interesting/funny conversations. Like I blew up a microwave at work (stupid mistake) but how do you integrate that into a conversation???

How can you have fun at a singles event? 2 simple rules.

Overdress.

Then flirt.

Smile at every girl there. Make eye contact with every girl there. Stop thinking about what it takes to sound interesting or cool or doing it right.

INSTEAD... let the girls work for you a little bit. Be free with the compliments. If you see a girl who looks nice, TELL HER. We're so fucking shy about this shit we forget that when a girl spends 2 hours getting ready (3, if she's from the UK... they work harder! , we are supposed to APPRECIATE it.

This line alone will make all the difference, and I am positive that you've never said it, and have a whole list of silly reasons why you think it's a bad idea to say it now... let them go, and try it:

"wow, you look great tonight! I'm Sean." (works best if your name actually IS Sean. :)

What's the worst that could happen? Go ahead and state your objections... so you can let them go.

Quote:

Thanks, sounds like great advice.

Yeah I've never gone up to a girl and been direct like that. Tbh I don't really have objects I guess I would worry that other people would think it was lame.

But when I picture myself doing that I get really strong positive visuals. Like I see her smile, eyes sparkle, etc. So what stops me I don't know. It's certainly not the assumption that she won't like it.

haha I have trouble with the initial part of conversatiosn, maybe I'm worried about the power behind being direct although when the girl is bubbly I can easily talk for an hour.

My objection is: Other people will think it lame - more like they will be envious of the girl because she got such an awesome compliment.

Good. When you state your imagined objections, they lose power.

Now, as for other people... 90% won't care either way cos they are too wrapped up in their own thoughts, just as you are. 8% will be envious and wish they were as confident as you, but because they are pussies will do nothing about it.

And 2% will be happy for you and the girl and welcome you to the club of people who happily don't give a fcuk.

Not that scary, is it?

One extra money move: when music is playing, ask a girl to dance. No one dances anymore and it makes girls sad. Be the dude that makes them happy. Nothing more alpha than walking up to a girl, standing before her with your hand out to take hers, and not saying a WORD. She'll know it's time to boogie. Oh, she'll know... Smile

field-tested and approved.

P.S. To check out the original thread from the 24/7 Dating Hotline, just sign up for the UCP and become part of the Inner Circle today:

http://lvo3.com/home/ucp

How to "Really" Playerize Your Pad

2008-12-11T16:38:00.000-08:00

Why Single Shy Guys Are Doomed

2008-12-04T15:23:00.000-08:00

Shy guys are doomed because they -

“Reject themselves before anyone else has a chance to accept them or reject them”

In the dating world, there are a lot of things that will improve you chances. There are thousands of teachers out there who will dramatically ramp up your game, no matter how shy, unattractive or old you (think) you’re.

BUT, it doesn’t matter if you learn to become a master flirt and all the other skills it takes to become better with women.

At the end of the day it’s still a numbers game.

Yes, learning these things will dramatically help you in that department but it’s still all about the numbers.

If you’re single and wondering why you’re still single, it’s because you’re not playing the numbers. How many girls a week do you flirt with? How many girls have you met in the last month?

If you’re shy like I was, the number is probably a big fat zero. And it’s stupid. There are women everywhere. You should at least be going on one date a week, if you’re single.

The problem with shy guys is they see a cute girl in a bookstore, she may smile at you but what do you do? If you’re like me you put your head down and walk away, while having a minor panic attack.

You just rejected yourself. Stop it. If you plan on ramping up your dating in the new year or just want to get over that nagging feeling of anxiety when you see a cute girl, then watch this video.

Professional dating instructor Sean Messenger recently gave me this to me, with the steps to takes to get over that anxiety.

Approach Anxiety Solutions from Dirk Tungsten on Vimeo.

How to Avoid the Dreaded Friendzone

2008-12-02T20:34:00.000-08:00

We’ve all heard that terrible phrase; just the sound of it alone sends painful shivers down my spine. The….

“Let’s Just be Friends” excuse.

It sucks, it’s like someone took your heart and stomped on it. You meet someone, you like them, you tell then and what you get is the “Let’s Just be Friends” B.S., which basically translates to “I’m not into you”.

The kicker of it is, it was your fault. You need to know when a girl is attracted to you when she’s not. And you also need to know how to generate attraction in others.

Like I said before attraction is NOT logical, it’s emotional. When you see a hot girl walking down the street, it’s not your logic that makes your head turn. It’s your natural emotional reaction.

When a girl sees a man with a powerful presence walk into a room, their heads will turn as well. It’s not logical. It’s emotional.

You need to become the man who naturally generates that emotional attraction in women. Otherwise you will always here the dreaded “Let’s just be friends” speech.

How do you do become that man who naturally generates attraction in women? It’s going to take time and guidance. And you will have to grow as a person. It’s going to be work but in a years time, you’ll look back at your currant dating life and wonder “WTF was I thinking” as you have your arm around the girl of your dreams.

So let’s get started on that road.

Here is a simple step to avoid the….

Dreaded Friendzone

1. Become a Master Flirt

It may sound daunting but it is actually easiest things to learn. Ask yourself, when talking to her are you speaking to her as a friend or a potential lover? There is a huge distinction there.

When you talk to her like a friend you’re not generating that emotional attraction we spoke about earlier.

Now, I know what you’re saying “but I don’t want to come off as creepy”. The thing of it is when you speak to a women on that level you’re just having a conversation. It’s not offensive, it’s not a trick, it’s just powerful flirting.

It’s amazingly simple to learn how to become a master flirt.
Sean Messenger did a post about it and taught it much better than I could. Click here to read his pos t.

4 Surefire Methods to Project Confidence

2008-12-01T19:10:00.000-08:00

In terms of dating, confidence is the “#1 must have” in order to attract the women you desire. If you don’t know how to project it, then you will either be single for the rest of your life or settle for someone you’re marginally attracted to or not into at all.

This is the reality of the situation. If you want to have greater choice with women, if you want to get the women of your dreams or if you just want to start dating again, then you NEED confidence.

Now, there is confidence in your abilities and confidence in yourself. If you’re just going on a first date with a girl that you like, there is really nothing you have to master. BUT if you’re a fighter pilot, then you’re going to need years of training before you’ve earned that confidence.

Did you get the two distinctions?

If you’re not naturally projecting confidence on a first date then you do not have confidence in your “abilities”, or better put your value as a human being. You’re most likely questioning your self-worth as a human being.

That is what is quietly going on in your head “am I good enough for this person”, “am I worthy”? This is the soundtrack of your self-esteem when it comes to dating women.

Some guys will have to worse then others but like I said earlier: “if you’re not naturally projecting confidence when you go on a date then YOU HAVE THE CURSE and you need to get over it”.

The first step is “faking it until you make”. It’s essentially bullshitting others. The second step is to believe in yourself, so you can naturally project confidence.

I’ll start with the first.

4 Steps for “Faking it until you Make” it Confidence.

1. Body Language

Only 10% communication is with our words, the other 90% is all Body Language and voice tone.

There are simple steps to dramatically increase the confidence you project with your body.

There are the fundamentals like stand up straight, take up as much space as possible, don’t approach anyone directly, always be at an angle, blah, blah.

But in my opinion watching and mimicking your favorite movie stars is the nuclear bomb of attractive, charismatic body language.

Movie Star Body Language:

What movies have had an influence on you (be honest)? Think of characters or actors you admire and traits they have you want to emulate. Get specific and pinpoint the specific things they do with their bodies that attract women and command attention.

What messages do you want to send with your body? Think of your body like a billboard. It is always displaying clear messages for everyone who cares to look, and women look (you don't catch them unless they want to be caught). If you don't know what you want to tell girls, you are telling them the wrong things. This is your chance to talk to girls without having to say a word, so choose your words carefully. Do you want to look fun? Sexy? Confident? In control? Choose what you want for yourself, and you will discover there are a lot of examples to show you what it looks like.

2. Voice

Use your voice. It’s simple but hard to make it a habit. What you want to do is project your voice and over enunciate everything you say.

Confident people do this because they deserve to be heard, they need to make themselves as clear as possible.

When ordering a coffee or doing whatever, make your voice a bit loader and over enunciate all of your words. It will be uncomfortable at first. But do this everyday and with everyone you meet for at least a month. After that it will become a habit.

3. Eye Contact

Eye Contact is one of the most powerful ways of comminuting and it’s also the most underutilized. I’ll give you a basic trick here but really you should invest in a program to learn the power of eye contact.

Here it is:

Make eye contact with everyone in your life. This can be very creepy if done wrong. The simple trick is to scan the area of the others face. You’re still looking at them and giving the impression of strong eye contact but what you’re really doing is expanding your awareness and looking at the person’s entire face. That way you won’t come off as creepy.

That is really just a parlor trick.

If you want to have powerful eye contact there is a course I recommend taking. It’s a month long training and it’s all on eye contact.

It will give small lessons and exercises each week, so at the end of the month you will not only know how to project confidence with your eyes but you will naturally have more seductive, confident and inviting eye contact. I can’t recommend it enough.

Check it out at this link.

4. Inner Confidence

The point of the fake it until you make it strategy is to actually become confident. Just dong the above will not get you there. You’ll have to do some work on this one.

Here is what you do. Everyday for 10 minutes (preferably in the morning) stand in front of the mirror and say your name, and follow this exactly.

“(Name), I want to fully acknowledge you for X” (this can be done out load or silent)

X can be anything. Doing a kick ass job on a test, at work, at the gym, whatever. Just make sure it is about something YOU are or did, like Chris you have a great sense of humor.

What you’re doing is giving yourself props everyday. If you’re like most people, you tend to focus on what you’re lacking, instead of acknowledging the great qualities in yourself.

I’m not saying change yourself so you are always thinking positive thoughts but what I am saying is you have to take some time to reflect on the things that are truly great about yourself.

Wrap up

Now #4 may seem, new agey or just downright stupid but it is a powerful method for gaining true confidence. It will also be the hardest one to do. You’ll have to search your brain for things to give yourself props for and you will be uncomfortable but stick with it.

You will have to do it for 90 days straight. Do not skip a day. If you do, start over and do it for 90 days.

I would incorporate all three. For the next 90 days, do #4 for 10 minutes at the exact same time everyday. Then go out and practice #1 - #3 in the real world.

After 30 days you’ll notice that you will start to naturally projecting more confidence without even thinking about it. After 90, you will have true inner confidence.

Go out and do it. It will change your life.

Top Ten Deadly Dating Mistakes

2008-11-30T18:56:00.000-08:00

Here are the Top Ten Deadly Mistakes that you never want to do with a women:

10. Being Nice or Overly Feminine In Order to Connect with Her

This is a big one. I’ve done this more times than I care to recount. It was only because I didn’t have a clue what women really wanted from me.

Most guys assume girl’s want the same thing as they do. Someone attractive, nice and someone they can relate too.

Well, it’s only the latter that they are interested in, in terms of connection. They want to connect with who you are, not who you’re pretending to be. That is what is attractive to women.

Sure they all would like a guy with six-pack abs and a pretty face but if that same “six pack abs’s man” was to “pretend to be nice”, they would avoid him with a 10 foot stick.

They want honesty, not someone who is pretending to be something they are not in order to get into their pants!

9. Being Afraid of Running Out Things to Say

I used to sweat bullets on this one. I’d be on a date, using my usual conversation starters “what do you do”, “where are your from” and somewhere around the ½ way mark the conversation would go dead. And I’d be stuck with the most awkward silence I’d ever experience in my entire life

The problem was I was speaking to her like a friend or a boring co-worker. I was not speaking to her as a potential lover.

Now, there are a ton of products out there that will teach you how to do this, so I won’t get into it this now.

What I will tell you is don’t ask the usual “get to know you” questions. You’re not on an interview, just a date.

Talk about her passions, ask her about her favorite food, ask her what she wants to do with her life.

And really listen to her response. Don’t think about the next thing to say, just listen and appreciate her for who she is and the conversation will flow naturally from there.

8. Trying to convince her to like you

Here is another one that I’ve done time and time again.

You’ll never be able to logically convince a girl to like you. Attraction is emotional. It’s a get level response. There is no logic in it.

Instead of trying to convince her, learn to be the man who naturally attracts women.

7. Showing too Much Interest

I have to be blunt with this one. This is the biggest turn off for women.

When you show too much interest, what you’re actually doing is being needy.
No one likes a needy, clingy person.

The real root of this problem is your need her to satisfy something that is lacking in your life.

And I hate to say it but if you’re counting on women to take away all of your problems, then you’re going down the long road that only leads to misery.

What you need to do is be the guy, who is able to honestly say “I want you but don’t need you”. If you’re at that place you’re 100% ahead of most guys out there.

6. Overcompensating

How much time do you spend in front of the mirror before going out on a date? Do you spend hours picking out your best clothes? Trying to come up with cool things to say to impress her?

What you have to realize is it’s just a date, no more, no less. You’ll have hundreds of them in your lifetime.

If you do find that you over compensate, invest in a product, book, program that will show you how to have a powerful, confident, movie star like presence. So you will not need to tell her all the things you’ve done to impress her. You’ll do that with your presence.

In short, stop trying to impress others. People will see right through it. Instead, try to impress yourself. Realize you're a person of value and you deserve to have great girlfriend and you will make her happy, just by being yourself.

5. Being afraid of messing it up

Has this ever happened to you? You’re on a first date, everything is going great until you’re stuck by a fear that you will mess it up?

It’s happened to me. No one wants to ruin a good thing, you want it to last forever but you know you could easily mess it up.

It’s an understandable fear. The problem is when you start to have that thought, you are going to be stuck in your head for the entire date.You will no longer be present with her.

When this happens, you will always mess it up.

What you have to do is come to terms with the fact that you’re not perfect. She is not perfect. Dates are not always perfect. Does is mean you won’t see her again?

Maybe.

It all depends if you accept the fact that you will occasionally mess things up and be cool with it. Once you do that, that fear will be eradicated from your mind.

4. Not Going in for the First Kiss

Here is another situation. You have a great date and you know that the girl wants to kiss you. But fear takes over. You’re paralyzed.

This is a huge turn off for women. She’ll think of you as weak and afraid. Every great thing you did during that date to attract her will be erased from her mind.

What you do in this situation is just go for it. Even if you’re physically shaking, do it. She’ll be more turned on by your courage than you would ever imagine.

The bottom line is trust what your gut is telling you. If it’s screaming that she wants a kiss, give it to her. You’ll do more damage by doing nothing than you would if you kissed her and she turned her cheek.

3. Trying to be her Friend

If you like a girl, you have to tell her. Don’t pretend to be a friend when you really want to date her. When you do this, you’re actually lying to her and f*cking with her emotions. Be straight up with her, don’t beat around the bush.

If you get rejected then you were not doing the things that spark her attraction.

The way to spark her attraction is to speak to as a potential lover, which you can easily learn to do by following this link.

Do not lie and pretend to be her friend. It will do more damage to both of you in the long run.

2. Thinking You’re Too Fat, Ugly, Dull, Short, Bald to Attract a Women

This is just a flat out lie that you’re telling yourself. Look around you; there are men of all shapes sized with gorgeous women. They’re everywhere.

You may say to yourself “well, he has money or a gigantic c*ck”. Well, that maybe true but in order to have a girl who really desires you, you need to learn how to attract women and keep them attracted.

Like I said earlier. Attraction is not logical, it’s emotional and looks do not matter if you know how to generate attraction. You can be:

Too Fat, Ugly, Dull, Short, Bald

And all of the above

And still get women. It’s not that hard to learn. There are thousands of guys out there who have learned it and now they're with the women of their dreams.

Don’t sell yourself short with your excuses.

1. Not getting help.

If you’re not getting the kind of results with women that you want, then you need to get help. There are thousands of resources on the net.

I’d stay clear of the Pickup Artist Style sites and go towards something that teaches you to not only attract women but increase your confidence, your presence and your sense of self worth.

You can do the Ultimate Coaching Program to get a running start or you can head over to seanmessenger.com and get a bunch of free advice.

Or you can go over to the Make Girls Smile Forms and get more free tips.

Either way, if you need help, don’t sit around and wait for it to suddenly change it will never happen.

The results you're getting today are going to be the same results you'll have for the rest of your life. Unless you get off your ass and do something different.

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2008-11-30T17:38:00.000-08:00

First post cliche